Gifts for Girls: Celebrating Your Flower Girl

Congratulations on your engagement! You've probably been working hard to plan your dream wedding and considering every detail, from the fit of your wedding dress to the color of the flowers in your bridal bouquet and beyond. We know it can be tough to find helpful information around wedding customs, especially if you're trying to figure out how to adapt them to your preferences.

Unfortunately, there's no master guidebook or formula around wedding planning. But we do know a thing or two about wedding traditions, since most of our customers come to us when celebrating their own milestone moments, including their nuptials.

In this blog post, we'll be answering the following questions, so you can decide how to best celebrate your flower girl, should you choose to have one in your bridal party. 

  • What's a flower girl, and what's the history behind flower girls?
  • What role can a flower girl play in your wedding?
  • Should you include a flower girl in your bridal party?
  • Who should you ask?
  • How can you ask a girl to join your bridal party?

What's a flower girl, and what's the history behind flower girls?

According to modern wedding tradition, a flower girl is typically the youngest female member of the bridal party. She precedes the bride down the aisle and throws flower petals to prepare the bride for her grand entrance to the altar. You don't need to include a flower girl into your own wedding ceremony, but many brides do choose to incorporate this tradition into their weddings. Later in this blog post, we'll address whether or not having a flower girl is right for you.

The tradition of the flower dates back to ancient Rome, when upper-class members of society would often include girls in their wedding processions. Instead of flower petals, they would throw grains and herbs, symbolizing fertility and prosperity, on the aisle ahead of the bride. Later, in the 14th century, flower girls even carried strands of garlic bulbs, which were believed to ward off evil and jealous spirits. Flowers didn't actually play a role in the tradition until the 16th century, and these included roses, orange blossoms, rosemary, and baby's breath. The image of the flower girl as we know her today began to emerge during the Victorian era.

What role can a flower girl play in your wedding?

Adorable as she is, your flower girl will "prime" the guests at your wedding reception for your walk down the aisle and inspire them to say "aww". She'll have a perfect dress, perhaps made to match your wedding gown or to mirror the colors you’ve chosen for your bridesmaids and maid or matron of honor. Is she going to melt hearts dropping petals down the aisle before you walk to meet your love to exchange vows? Or carry a pretty nosegay and hopefully walk sweetly with the ring bearer? Regardless, she's the "opening act".

You can also assign the flower girl a specific duty. If you have multiple flower girls, then each one can be responsible for a different thing. For example, one flower girl can throw flower petals, while another can hold the train of your dress. If you have a beloved pet you'd like in your wedding, then your flower girl can escort that pet down the aisle. For a non-traditional take on the flower girl role, you can give her a bubble wand or even a sign instead of flowers. Your flower girls will love the grown-up feeling they get from having specific responsibilities!

Depending on the age of the flower girl, she may only be present at your ceremony and not at your reception. Some flower girls stay for the beginning part of the reception but then leave with her parents to adhere to her bedtime. Other flower girls skip the reception completely, since it's more appropriate for the adults.

Should you have a flower girl in your bridal party?

Whether or not you choose to have a flower girl in your bridal party depends primarily on personal preference and how many people you'd like to include in your bridal party in total. It also depends on the availability of flower girl candidates as well as any rules set by your venue.

When it comes to personal preference, you're likely either a bride who loves tradition or one who prefers to create her own rules. Someone who's more closely aligned with wedding traditions will probably want to have a flower girl. The image of a young girl tossing flower petals down the aisle is a recognizable one in American culture. If you don't want to follow wedding traditions, then you may decide to borrow some aspects of a bridal party or completely opt out of having one. No one should ever judge you for wanting to follow tradition or departing from it.

Even if you choose to plan a more traditional wedding with a bridal party, you may be limited by your budget or resources. Or maybe you just want to keep your wedding planning efforts to a minimum. Having fewer people in your bridal party ensures less stress for you. However, if you're hiring a wedding planner and/or a day-of coordinator, then you may have more bandwidth for a larger bridal party, including a flower girl or two.

You also need to consider the available flower girl candidates. If you don't have any family members who fit the description, then you may want to look to close friends who have young daughters. They should be old enough to be able to walk down the aisle and young enough to not be considered bridesmaids. We don't recommend asking someone you barely know simply for the sake of having a flower girl.

You may be surprised to learn that some venues may not allow flower petals, since petals can stain. It's highly unlikely that your venue's rules will get in the way of your plans, but you'll always want to consider any potential limitations before you make your decision. If your venue doesn't allow your flower girl to throw petals, then you can have her hold a basket of petals without throwing them or ask the venue of silk petals would be a suitable alternative.

Who should you ask?

You can ask a family member like a niece or a cousin or even the daughter of a close friend. Typically, flower girls are between the ages of three to eight years old, but that rule isn't set in stone. You can potentially ask someone younger or older - as long as they can get down the aisle, and they feel excited about doing so!

You also don't necessarily have to choose just one flower girl. If you have many nieces and cousins, for example, you can invite them all to participate in your bridal party! The best part about asking everyone to join is that no one will feel left out of the fun. As mentioned earlier, each flower girl can have her own specific duty, helping her feel important.

How can you ask a girl to join your bridal party?

At this point, you've probably decided that you'd like to include a flower girl in your bridal party, and you likely have the perfect candidate or candidates in mind. What's the best way to ask this little girl to participate in your big day?

Before asking the girl herself, you'll first want to check with her parents to ensure you have their permission. You'll also want to discuss with the flower girl's parents who will pay for the dress and any associated accessories. Traditionally, the bride's parents pay for this item, but you can also offer to pay for the dress yourself. In some cases, the flower girl's parents may decline the offer and decide they want to pay instead.

Once you have the parents' permission, you can brainstorm some cute ways to ask your flower girl to join the party. She may not be old enough for a diamond, but she'll love a Ring Pop lollipop. Get her in the wedding spirit by "proposing" to her with this candy treat. If your flower girl has a sweet tooth, but you can't get your hands on a Ring Pop, consider surprising her with a decadent dessert like a mini cake that features your question in icing. Get her in the floral spirit by designing a beautiful flower crown with blossoms in your wedding colors. If she's very young and will need help understanding what being a flower girl means, then you can buy her a book like The Little Flower Girl, which will answer any questions she may have.

What are the best gifts for girls in your bridal party?

Now that you've considered all the options, you may have taken the plunge and asked a young female family member or dear friend’s daughter to be the flower girl in your wedding. You and your fiance may even have a large extended family, so you'll need to include a couple of nieces, cousins, or siblings to be flower girls. What meaningful gifts for little girls can you select as a keepsake for each one? You'll want to choose just the right present to thank her for participating in your wedding ceremony - it will be a big day for her too!

The Add-A-Pearl necklace is a timeless tradition that's ideal for exactly this sort of important occasion. In fact, we're known for having some of the best gifts for girls, so our customers return again and again while also referring their friends.

Traditionally on their wedding day, many brides wear pearls as a symbol of lasting love and a promise that seems particularly fitting for the powerful moment when two people pledge to each other a lifetime of fidelity. Even if you aren’t personally wearing a strand of pearls on your wedding day, starting Add-A-Pearl necklaces will make meaningful gifts for girls in your bridal party.

You can present it to your flower girl, sharing with her the meaning behind the pearls and how much you appreciate her participation in your wedding. As you explain how the Add-A-Pearl tradition works and that she can receive more pearls to add to her necklace in years to come, suggest to her that perhaps if she marries someday she might decide to wear that same necklace as a bride.

Whether the flower girls are tiny tots, school-age girls, or young teens, they - and their parents - will appreciate that you have given them a beautiful piece of jewelry they can wear for your wedding day and other special days in the future. Receiving a fine pearl necklace will make them feel grown-up and important. It's one of the best gifts for girls, letting them have something to show the guests at your wedding and to treasure for many years to come.

Honor your Flower Girls with the gift of Add-A-Pearl!

The best part of an Add-A-Pearl necklace is that it grows with each young woman. Other family members may decide to add to the necklace, and with each pearl they'll build a legacy of love she will pass along to future generations.

This is a truly thoughtful gift for a very memorable celebration. You could even decide to add pearls to her necklace each year on the anniversary of your wedding or on your milestone anniversary years.

Looking for the perfect gift for your flower girl? Start the timeless Add-A-Pearl tradition for the special girls in your wedding party or contact the Add-A-Pearl team at (855) 392-6640 for assistance.

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